How to Peacefully Parent Your Strong-willed Child

If you’re a parent of a strong-willed child, you know that things can often be a little bit harder than with other kids. These children can be more stubborn and determined, making it difficult to get them to do what they want. However, there are ways to effectively parent your strong-willed child and maintain peace in your home. Here are some tips.

Avoid Power Struggles

Power struggles are a common occurrence between parents and strong-willed children. These can be frustrating and exhausting for both parties involved. To avoid power struggles, try to use positive reinforcement instead of punishment. This means rewarding your child for good behavior instead of punishing them for bad behavior. 

You can also avoid arguing with your child and instead offer them choices. For example, you can say, “Would you like to wear a blue or green shirt?” This lets your child feel like they have some control while still getting them to do what you want.

Be Consistent

It’s important to be consistent when parenting a strong-willed child. This means having the same rules and expectations for your child. If you’re inconsistent, your child will likely try to take advantage of the situation. They may test boundaries and see what they can get away with. 

Be sure to follow through with your threats and promises to avoid this. If you say you’re going to do something, do it. This will help your child know that you mean what you say and that they can’t take advantage of the situation.

Pick Your Battles

With a strong-willed child, you may not be able to win every battle. It’s important to pick your battles and choose the most important ones to you. There will be times when it’s not worth arguing with your child over something small. Let them have their way on these occasions and save your energy for the bigger things. Some kids may try to take advantage of this, but as long as you’re consistent with the bigger things, they’ll eventually learn.

These are just a few tips for parenting a strong-willed child. Every child is different, so you may have to adapt these tips to fit your child’s specific needs. But if you use these tips, you’ll be able to parent your strong-willed child more peacefully.

Four Things Every Freelancer Should Have on Their Website

For freelancers, a website is a crucial gateway to more business. Clients use freelancers’ websites to scope out their work, decide if the freelancer is a good fit for their needs, and ultimately hire them. That is why every freelancer must include the following four things on their website.

Why a Client Should Hire You

Every aspect of your website should be designed so that clients know right away why you are the best choice. Your site should state the services that you provide upfront. If clients have to hunt through your website to find out if you are a copywriter or someone who can design their logo, they’re likely to move on to another freelancer.

Your website should also have information that explains how you stand out from other freelancers. Include more details about your niche or any special skills you have.

Your Portfolio

Explaining why you are the best freelancer for the job is not enough. Potential clients will want to see examples of previous work you have done for other clients. You should have a dedicated space on your website to showcase your portfolio. This can include sample designs, clips from writing projects, or other accomplishments from your career.

Easy Booking Tools

Once clients have expressed interest in your work, your website should make it easy for them to contact and hire you. Include a contact form or booking tool directly on your website to make the hiring process easy.

Make Your Website Work for You

Your website is not just a way for clients to find you. It should be a way for you to grow your profile and increase your network without doing much active work. A website can work for you by collecting email addresses for marketing materials and pitches. Include a sign-up sheet or subscription box on your website to collect contact information.

Building an effective website may seem like a daunting task for many freelancers, but including these four things can help you generate business and grow your profile.

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Originally published on JenniferPowersNYC.Medium.com

Dealing With Toxic Parents

It can be incredibly challenging to cope with someone who is toxic when it happens to be a parent. Various things can be done to minimize the effects of toxic parents. This article will walk you through some of these steps and provide helpful tips on handling toxic parents.

The term toxic parent is not a medical term or a defined concept. Instead, it refers to parents who regularly act in a way that causes resentment, fear, and guilt in their kids. Instead of apologizing, toxic parents usually refuse to acknowledge that their actions are wrong. They also tend to abuse or neglect their kids.

You might also feel that their behavior is self-centered. It could be that they cannot provide the support you need. You also might think that their behavior is manipulative. They use their emotions to control you. Although it’s normal for people to have bad days and outbursts, it’s also possible that the behaviors during your childhood affected the way you developed as an adult.

DON’T BLAME YOURSELF

You might also blame yourself for their actions. Being an adult can make it hard to live up to your expectations. It can also make it hard to form healthy self-esteem. Family is a vital part of a person’s life, and it influences their thoughts and behavior. It’s also the foundation for their general worldview.

After learning that you were exposed to toxic parents, it may be helpful to recognize some of the harmful behaviors you experienced. Although it can be hard to change, behavior patterns can be modified with time and support. The first step in developing new habits is acknowledging the things that have affected your behavior.

SETTING CLEAR BOUNDARIES

One of the first things that you should do is set clear boundaries. While it can’t change the behavior of other individuals, setting boundaries can help you manage the interactions with toxic parents. This is an invisible line you can set for yourself and prevent someone from crossing, such as setting specific topics off-limits in conversations. Don’t leave the boundaries up for interpretation. Having clear boundaries can help you avoid accidentally pushing past them. Don’t get defensive if they have crossed them; just reiterate your limits and take a step back from contact if needed. You are the person who can make changes and take back control of your life. Set goals and make a plan to achieve them.

DON’T CARRY THE BURDEN ALONE

It’s important to reflect on how your childhood experiences affected you and what made you act. Talk to a trusted friend or family member about this topic. You don’t have to go on a path of healing alone. Having a mental health professional can also help guide you through the process.

To start, write down a list of things you would like to change. Once you have a list, practice addressing the one you want to change first.

In this situation, expect to face some challenging times. But, remember that you are also responsible for the progress of the things you want to change. You can also change the way you act and react by reminding yourself that you are the one who has control over all of your actions.

Consider starting therapy and sharing your boundaries with family members who will back you up. This will give you peace of mind knowing that the people involved are there to help.

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Originally published on JenniferPowers.me

How Parenting Styles Affect Child Personality

Although developmental psychologists have studied how parents affect children’s development for many years, they cannot clearly demonstrate how their actions affect kids’ behavior. Some children who share a home can have very different personalities. Despite the obstacles to studying this topic, researchers believe that the parenting styles that children grow up under can affect their adult behavior.

Diana Baumrind, a psychologist, studied over a hundred preschool-age kids in the 1960s. She used various research methods to identify the different dimensions of parenting. She learned that most parents have three different parenting styles based on these dimensions. These styles influence multiple aspects of their kids’ behavior.

AUTHORITARIAN

One particular parenting style is authoritarian, which involves parents setting rules that their kids must follow. This type of parenting usually leads to punishment. While parents have high expectations, they rarely respond to their kids’ mistakes. Instead, they provide minimal direction regarding their kids’ future actions. According to Baumrind, parents who have this style expect their kids to follow their orders without explanation. They are often described as authoritarian and oppressive. Many parents with an authoritative style set rules and guidelines that their kids follow.

AUTHORITATIVE

This type of parenting is responsive to the needs of its children. Although it demands a lot of their attention, these parents provide adequate support and warmth. The combination of expectations and support helps children develop skills such as self-control and independence.

PERMISSIVE

Permissive parents are the type of parent who rarely disciplines their kids due to their low expectations. They are more lenient and can be more friendly with their kids.

UNINVOLVED

Aside from the three major styles, psychologists John Martin and Eleanor Maccoby also introduced the fourth type of parenting, uninvolved. While parents provide their kids with the proper nourishment and shelter, they often do not offer them enough support and guidance. This type of parenting leaves them vulnerable to abuse or neglect.

The effects of these parenting styles on a child’s development are still unclear. Several studies have been conducted to study the impact of these styles on a child’s behavior. Although authoritarian parenting styles can lead to higher levels of obedience and proficiency, they are also lower in social competence, self-esteem, and happiness. Permissive parenting is known to lower a child’s self-esteem and happiness. It also increases their chances of experiencing problems with authority. The uninvolved styles have the lowest social, academic, and personal development scores.

The styles of parents can create a unique blend in their families. For instance, a mother who has an authoritative style may adopt a more permissive approach while a father follows an authoritarian one. It can be challenging for parents to maintain a consistent approach to parenting due to the various styles they adopt.

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Originally published on JenniferPowers.me

How to Support Your Depressed Child

It is essential to prepare for the various challenges your child may experience as a parent. Depression is not as rare as we think it is. According to a 2016 study, 12.8% of US teenagers had a major depressive episode. During adolescence, many phases can affect a teenager’s behavior. Identifying the warning signs of depression can help prevent a teenager from experiencing it untreated for too long. 

Support Your Child

Family support is a vital aspect of maintaining a healthy social relationship. Establishing this type of support can help build a strong foundation for their future social relationships. Having the support of other family members can also help develop a child’s trust, allowing them to talk about their problems.

Encourage Healthy Choices

A healthy lifestyle can also help manage the symptoms of depression. It can also encourage a child to adopt a healthy lifestyle as they become more independent. Being subtle in your suggestions can help motivate teenagers to adopt a healthy lifestyle without pushing back.

Getting kids to exercise regularly reduces their stress levels and improves their mental health. Encourage them to participate in various forms of physical activity, like sports or even going for regular walks.

Food is also known to improve our brains’ ability to cope with stress. Having a variety of healthy meals can help minimize stress and improve their mental health.

Getting enough sleep is also essential for our bodies to function correctly. Having a consistent bedtime can help keep a child focused on getting enough sleep. Our bodies follow rhythms, so going to sleep and waking up at similar times can help your child get better quality sleep and improve their mental health.

Encourage Social Interaction

Depression can also lead to isolation. It can make it hard for a child to connect with new people or feel unmotivated to hang out with friends. This can also worsen their symptoms, as social support and connection are vital for maintaining good mental health.

Being able to support and listen to your child is also significant to helping them cope with their depression. Follow the advice above to do so.

Understanding FMLA and Short Term Disability for Pregnancy

New parents who want to work during and after the birth of their baby often find themselves overwhelmed. But understanding employee protections and rights for medical leave isn’t something a family should stress over. This information from Medela helps clear up questions and concerns new parents may have regarding parental leave during and after pregnancy.

Unfortunately, there isn’t any single law or national standard that covers everyone the same regarding parental leave. So, new parents will have to look at what their company offers and what they qualify for. Short-term disability and FMLA are two common options that new parents have to choose from.

Short-term disability is often used when employees suffer from an illness or injury. Employees can also use it during or after pregnancy if they can’t work. Companies that offer short-term disability may allow employees to receive part of their normal pay when they cannot work because of a medical condition.

The Family and Medical Leave Act, or FMLA, is a form of federally mandated medical leave. Eligible employees can use FMLA to take time off from work when recovering from or seeking treatment for qualifying medical conditions. Employers are required to grant FMLA to their employees who meet the following conditions:

  • The employee has worked for the company for at least 12 months.
  • The employee has worked at least 1,250 hours in the 12-month period leading up to the start of the employee’s leave.
  • The company has at least 50 employees within a 75-mile radius.

Employees who are eligible for FMLA can take up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave within a 12-month period. When an employee returns from a medical leave covered by FMLA, they can expect three basic rights:

  • The company cannot discriminate against employees for taking leave or for the reason of their leave.
  • The employee will keep the same job or an equal job.
  • The company may alter the employee’s schedule, or return them on an intermittent or part-time basis.

Since FMLA is unpaid leave, employees should also look into options for paid employer-provided leave as well. Some states have laws about required paid parental leave for new parents. But even in those states that don’t, many companies are offering paid parental leave to support their employees who are new moms and dads.

This article was originally published on JenniferPowers.me

Parenting Trends We’re Embracing in 2022

There is no denying that the past couple of years has been rough ones for raising children. Through two years of a global pandemic, parents have learned a lot and are ready to move into 2022 with some new perspectives. To welcome a safer year, here are five parenting trends to incorporate into your family life.

Prioritizing Experiences

The science is in, and it clearly shows that

experiences make people happier than things. After being cooped up during lockdown, there is a growing trend towards travel and experiential gifts.

Taking the time to cultivate relationships and appreciate loved ones has led people to plan experiences to enjoy together instead of stocking up on more stuff.

Involved fathering

If we saw anything over the pandemic, it was that working from home gives parents the opportunity to split parenting duties more evenly. And moms liked it! One huge step the United States could take to help families (and catch up to the rest of the world) is to enact nationwide paid parental leave. Giving parents an equal opportunity to bond with their infants and allowing both parents the chance to prioritize parenting and their careers are good for the whole family.

More Veggies!

Plant proteins are growing in popularity, so even choosy children may find more veggies on their plates this year. Schools are leading the way in the plant-based food trend, serving more veggie burgers and school lunches spotlighting creative uses of plant protein.

Connecting through TikTok

Parents have found a community of TikTokkers who share their experiences raising kids in a raw, honest way that really hits home. It is so refreshing to see social media used to let others know that they are not alone in their struggles. Not to mention, TikTok has hilarious and relatable parenting humor and hacks that just might make life with little ones just a bit easier.

Dealing with Feelings

It is past time for people to be able to talk about their feelings openly. Everyone experienced trauma through the pandemic, but the impact on adolescents and kids has been especially severe. Children have had to confront grief, isolation, and major disruptions to their routines, leading to higher rates of depression and anxiety. As we adjust to life with COVID-19, this year is a year to focus on children’s mental and emotional recovery.

This article was originally published on JenniferPowers.me

Positive Parenting Books to Read

Positive parenting focuses on building a positive relationship with your kids while still maintaining the rules and structure of your household. In this parenting style, you let your children have a say in the decisions being made. Positive parenting books show parents how to understand their kids better to communicate more clearly and reduce stress on both ends. The following are some great positive parenting books to read.

Positive Discipline

This book describes positive parenting techniques for different age groups, including toddlers, older kids, and teens. Some of the important takeaways from this book are being an understanding parent and teaching your children why you’re making certain rules in your household. The book emphasizes having mutual respect between the child and the parent.

The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed

This book focuses on how important it is for your kids to fail in life and learn from their mistakes. For them to have this opportunity, you must let go of certain responsibilities that could lead to them failing. Your children’s mistakes will help them understand how the world works, making their future interactions more successful.

How to Talk, so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk

This book offers a guide for parents on effective communication with their kids. The positive parenting advice from this book is to get your children involved in the decisions being made in your household, which includes what they will eat, wear, and more. Also, don’t ask too many questions because it will make them angry or resentful of you.

You’re Not the Worst Mommy

The important points to note from this book are that you do not have to discipline your children every time they misbehave and that your children will make mistakes. Instead, you should always tell your kids how much you love them and be grateful for all the wonderful things they do.

The Parenting Journey

The authors Robert J. MacKenzie and Jean E. Dumasshare several techniques in this book that will help ease the stress between you and your child. The authors believe strongly in positive reinforcement when your kids are good, so they know what you expect from them. This book is great for parents that want their children to be more independent while still maintaining some level of control.

Positive parenting books are a great resource for parents who want to grow their relationships with their kids while establishing rules and boundaries. Reading these books will give you ideas that will help improve your communication skills with your children so everybody can be happier in the end.

This article was originally published on JenniferPowersNYC.com

Differences between Attachment and Gentle Parenting

Both Gentle Parenting and Attachment Parenting is a parenting style that emphasizes forming a close emotional connection with your child. However, the two parenting styles differ in developing this close emotional bond. By understanding the differences, you will choose a manner that is more appropriate for both you and your child. These parenting styles have both been developed in response to what is perceived as mainstream Parenting or ‘parenting by punishment and reward.’ In contrast, mainstream Parenting provides the correct information on how to care for your child.

Differences between Attachment and Gentle Parenting

Both Attachment Parenting and Gentle Parenting emphasize forming a close emotional attachment with your child. However, the two parenting styles differ in how this is achieved.

Equality

Gentle Parenting places emphasis on creating an equal, nurturing support system. In contrast, Attachment Parenting is based around the notion that the mother will have the primary role of caring for and being a parent to the child.

Parental Influence

Gentle Parenting places emphasis on providing your child with opportunities to make decisions and teaching them respect and good manners. Both parenting styles question the idea that parents will always have the final say on decisions, though Gentle Parenting questions this even more.

Responsibilities

Gentle Parenting emphasizes creating a child who is confident and independent but who needs to rely on others. In contrast, Attachment Parenting is based around the idea that it is the responsibility of each individual to maintain themselves, their family, and their friends.

Discipline

Gentle Parenting is based upon the idea that you should use discipline passively and that punishment can be damaging. In contrast, Attachment Parenting bases discipline on the idea that you should use discipline proactively to teach the child right from wrong.

Peaceful Parenting

Gentle Parenting is based on creating a peaceful home atmosphere to move children towards a more peaceful world. In contrast, Attachment Parenting does not focus on the home environment. Instead, it focuses on allowing the child to make their own mistakes while providing them with unconditional love and support.

Gentle Parenting 

Gentle Parenting is based upon the idea that respect and love should become a way of life. One of the main principles of Gentle Parenting is that children are encouraged to make their own mistakes, to learn from them, and to develop a sense of responsibility. This is achieved through using parental influence to encourage children’s decisions and independence. In contrast, Attachment Parenting encourages children to follow parental guidance and trust the parent.

Conclusion

Both Gentle Parenting and Attachment Parenting is based on the idea that it is essential that children learn to trust their parents, as much of their future can be influenced by this trust. The most crucial difference between these styles is that Attachment Parenting emphasizes the child’s independence, while Gentle Parenting emphasizes the child’s ability to make decisions and grow into their personalities.

Best Advice for New Moms

Becoming a mother is a wondrous occasion filled with more joy than often a new mom imagines. It can feel like her heart doubled in size, bursting with boundless love for the new life that she just created. Though fervently devoted to her little one, it is common for doubt to creep in as a new mother questions her choices and her competency as a parent. While this new role can seem daunting, there are some things a new mom can do to help her confidently face her new responsibilities.

Firstly, a new mother must ask for help and accept it when it’s offered. Many mothers want to do it all themselves. However, receiving support can mean valuable time to get more done, including sneaking in a much-needed nap or two.

Secondly, a new mother must not allow her new role to hurt her relationship with her partner. Becoming parents often affects couples negatively as they pour their attention on their children and away from each other. Therefore, new parents must create time for one another to nurture their bond, as a strong relationship is necessary for the family’s success.

Thirdly, new mothers should align themselves with those who understand their journey. Many groups consist of mothers, new mothers, and even mothers whose children were born on the same day. These groups offer support and wise counsel and meet virtually or in person. Joining a mothers’ group is an excellent way for a new mom to connect to other women who know what she’s going through.

Lastly, new mothers must enjoy this time despite all the chaos, newness, and uncertainty. What they say about it going by fast is true, so making memories is important. New mothers must play with their children, laugh with them, and enjoy their company. Ultimately, what little ones want is their parents’ attention, so a new mother must enjoy each moment with her little one and work on building a bond that will be a foundation for a loving, lifelong relationship.

A new mother must remember to be kind to herself and accept that she’s doing a great job. Even when things don’t come out as anticipated, she grows and learns and does her best.

Article originally published on JenniferPowers.me